Being Worthy

I don’t know if this blog is going to make sense or not, I am writing as it comes to me, and I am not going to spend to much editing it. Otherwise it wont be said.

I have a hard time accepting compliments. Not just compliments on how I look, but moreso on what type of person that I am. I know that in general I am a good person. That I have a big heart. A lot of times I am to nice for my own good. I am one of those people that don’t like the spotlight on me so much. I prefer to be a behind the scenes person, shining the light on others.

People like to tell me that I am an amazing person, or that they admire me. I get thanked a lot too, LOL. I don’t see it. What I do, I do because it needs to be done, if that makes sense. One thing I hear a lot is how strong of a person I am for taking care of the home, and my kids with my husband a few countries away. How lucky he is to have me. I don’t see it that way. I see it as we are married, and we support each other. I didn’t like that he had to go back to Honduras before I did, but I understood it, and I supported him. Me taking care of the kids until we go, well that’s just what I do. Its just life. Tons of people in this world do that. People with spouses in the military do it. There are so many women in other countries that take care of the home and children by themselves while the father comes to the US to work.

A while back I was talking to someone, and she said that she admired me, and I sort of laughed it off. And her response to me was “You are a beautiful woman, inside and out, and you have a strength that is beyond what most people will ever achieve. You are a survivor, a mother, a wife, and a lover, and you excel in all those things. You are blessed and you bring a blessing to all you come in contact with. Above that, you are a child of the King, and that makes you a Princess, worthy of all the good things in life.” Reading that made me cry. She also told me to go and read Proverbs 31: 10-31.

Reading what she said to me, and reading the scripture, it made me realize that I am worthy of the praise, even when it makes me feel uncomfortable. It made me realize that I am special, and that I need to take time out every once in a while to realize that myself.

To remind myself, I am going to have the scripture put somewhere, either in a frame, or something, so that I can see it often, and be reminded that I am worthy of good things.

PROVERBS 31: 10-31
10 A wife of noble character who can find?

She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her

and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,

all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax

and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,

bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still dark;

she provides food for her family

and portions for her servant girls.
16 She considers a field and buys it;

out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;

her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,

and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff

and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor

and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;

for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;

she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,

where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,

and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;

she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,

and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household

and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;

her husband also, and he praises her:
29 "Many women do noble things,

but you surpass them all."
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
31 Give her the reward she has earned,

and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.